Domestic Violence Power & Control Wheel

It’s been awhile since this was originally posted so we thought we should bring it to the forefront of people’s awareness.

This wheel is used to understand the complicated dynamics of domestic violence and some of the forms it can take.  Domestic violence as you can see is not just physical.

To learn more about the Power and Control Wheel, visit the Home of the Duluth Model online.



STOP THE SILENCE —10/14/2014

Have you taken a ride past the First Covenant Church on H Street in Iron Mountain, MI?  Each cross you see displayed out in front represents one person from the Upper Peninsula who was killed in a Domestic Violence situation.  Who will the next cross represent?  Will it be your sister or brother?  Your neighbor?  A favorite teacher at the school?  Your doctor’s wife?  It could be anyone!  You can’t tell if someone is a victim by looking at them.  They look like me or you.  Wounds aren’t always visible.  Victims are very, very good at pretending everything is ok.

Are you aware of the Domestic Violence in this world?  Do you care?  Every football fan in the United States should know…watch the video of Ray Rice hitting his wife.  Listen to sports personnel talk about how hundreds of cases of Domestic Violence have been covered up.  We all think that good old guy we know couldn’t do such a thing,  why he’s a great guy and fun to be around  (unless he comes home to you each night).  Each and every one of us should be more aware.  Abusers get away with it because they can.  Nobody wants to get involved.  If you see something or hear something that you think may be abuse call the police, that’s the only way this will end.  Don’t keep SILENT!!!  We need everyone to make abusers accountable for their actions.

One way you can help is to come out to our annual  “Break the Silence, Stop the Violence” procession, if you are able.  We will meet at The Dickinson County Sheriff’s Department between noon & 12:15 on Tuesday October 14th.  This year we will be joined by the MI Bikers Helping Veterans Motorcycle group, followed by area law enforcement with sirens blaring, followed by cars honking their horns.  If you can drive or ride in a car and honk a horn you can join us.  The procession will proceed to Caring House where refreshments will be served.  We need YOU!!

Let’s make some changes and shake up this county, so we can shake up this state, so we can shake up our country and shake up the world.  Let’s make this world a safer place.




➤ Believe it’s your fault.

➤ Feel angry, sad, lonely, depressed, or confused.

➤ Feel helpless to stop the abuse.

➤ Feel threatened, humiliated, or ashamed.

➤ Feel anxious, trapped, or lonely.

➤ Worry about what might happen next.

➤ Feel like you can’t talk to family or friends.

➤ Be afraid of getting hurt.

➤ Feel protective of your boyfriend or girlfriend.

➤ Feel bad about yourself because the abuser says

you are stupid, lazy, ugly, worthless, helpless, crazy,

or things like that.

These are normal reactions

to being abused.

You are not alone.





➤ Listen. Show support. Don’t blame the victim for

the crime. Tell your friend that you’re worried about

them. Ask how you can help.

➤ Encourage your friend to seek help; give them

information about victim service providers.

➤ Avoid confronting the abuser. It could be dangerous.

➤ Instead of deciding what’s best for your friend,

help your friend make their own decisions.

➤ Find someone you can talk to about your feelings

about the situation.



  • An average 233,986 Americans age 12 and older are sexually assaulted each year.
  •  Every 2 minutes, someone in the U.S. is sexually assaulted.

Who Are the Victims:


  •  1 out of every 6 American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime.
  • Among all victims, about nine out of ten are female.
  •  1 out of every 33 American men has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in his lifetime.
  •   About 10% of all victims are male.


  • Age of sexual assault victims: 15% are under age 12.
  • 29% are age 12-17 o
  • 44% are under age 18 o 80% are under age 30
  •  Ages 12-34 are the highest risk years
  •  Girls ages 16-19 are four times more likely than the general population to be victims of sexual assault.

 Race:  Estimated persons raped in lifetime by gender and race:


  • 17.7% of white women
  • 18.8% of African-American women
  •  6.8% of Asian / Pacific Islander women
  •  34.1% of American Indian / Alaskan Native women
  •  24.4% mixed race women
  •  14.6% of Hispanic women


  •  2.8% of white men
  •  3.3% of African-American men
  •  4.4% of mixed race men
  •  The sample size was too small to estimate for Asian/ Pacific Islander and American Indian / Alaskan Native men

Effects of Rape:

 Physical Injuries:

  • occur in 100% of completed rapes
  • occur in  39% of attempted rapes
  • 17% sexual assaults against females result in injured victims
  • 33% of victims sustain minor (bruises and chipped teeth) physical injuries
  • 5% of victims sustain major (broken bones and gunshot wounds) injuries
  • 61% of victims sustain undetermined injuries
  •  Only around 36% of injured victims receive medical care.

 Mental Health Victims of sexual assault are:

  •  3 times more likely to suffer from depression.
  •  6 times more likely to suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder.
  • 13 times more likely to abuse alcohol.
  •  26 times more likely to abuse drugs.
  •  4 times more likely to contemplate suicide.


  • About 1 in 11 sexual assault victims reported that they suffered some economic loss as a consequence of the crime.
  • The average economic loss (in 1997) was about $200
  • Nearly 7% of victims reported losing time from work.

Caring House has a sexual assault advocate who wants to assist anyone who has experienced  sexual assault.